Monday, May 7, 2012

Tender moments...

our youngest Brendon saying goodbye to his grandmother
Those quiet times when you say goodbye.  I have been privileged to watch people come and say goodbye to my mom for the last two days.  She is now unresponsive for the most part.  Her dog Princess keeps a quiet vigil on her master by laying faithfully at her side.   I am sad because I thought there would be more time to plan her funeral and ensure any of her wishes were fulfilled. 

My mother is one of those rare people who attract very loyal and dear friends.  She is such a sweet person!  I have been so blessed to really get to see what a beautiful person she is.  We spent too much of our life being too much alike and really not liking to look into that mirror at we saw in each other.  Which was in essence eachother and our simularities.

 My dad died, suddenly of a stroke, 18 months ago.  my mom tearfully told me how much she loved me and how sorry she was about my dad's imminent  passing. The doctor had just told her, while I was in the bathroom, that my dad had a massive stroke and his brain was engulfed in blood.  We were still in the Emergency room and I remember her hugging me and saying, "I LOVE YOU" and I said, "How could you love me, you don't even like me!"  I remember her hugging me tighter and saying, "I do love you!"  We just sobbed in each other's arms.

 I prayed and asked God to help us figure out our relationship and give us the time to do this before she died, because I didn't want there to be any hard feelings for me to deal with after she left this world.  I seriously didn't want her to have cancer that metathesized into her brain, but I am so very fortunate that we healed our relationship and forgave past hurts, before she came to the place where she isn't communicating.  I am thankful that I was able to care for her and show her the love she showed me when I was a little girl.   I reassured her that she was a great mom! 


It won't be long before the woman God gave to be my momma, will be making her final journey to heaven.  I think she held on for her friend Diane Birk to come see her.  I think she needed to write her thoughts in a thank you note and Diane was kind enough to do this.   I just read something on the Internet about the five things you must do before you die and she did all of them. 



The five tasks of dying

Ask for forgiveness
offer forgiveness
Offer heartfelt thanks
Offer Sentiments of Love
Say goodbye



My heart hurts because I know, I will soon never have her touch or see her smile, until I make my journey to be with her in Heaven.  I will never be able to call another woman Momma here on this earth; but soon, she will be reunited with her momma in heaven just in time for Mother's day.  



http://dying.about.com/od/thedyingprocess/a/5_tasks_dying.htm * taken from this website

1 comment:

  1. LaDon thanks so much for sharing this blog with us. I love your mom so much. I have been in tears off and on since Sunday. I finally quit my Bakersfield job and was so excited to have time to spend with her. See is so special. I have never had a friend as faithful as she. I will miss her dearly. Even when I lived in Bakersfield I knew I had a prayer warrior in Judy. You are taking such good care of your mom. I'm so glad you have had this experience to take care of her. I remember how it was my mom. I felt it was an honor to be able to help her. I miss my mama. I know how hard it is to see them go through it all. But your mom and mine too handle this phase with grace and it is because of their faith in Jesus Christ. He paid the price. He took are place and then went to heaven to prepare a place for us. Thank you God for this free gift if we believe. God bless you LaDon. Live Kelley

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