Day two life is just a great big whirl of emotion.  We are still in go mode, with three hours sleep, I am up and going.  I feel the need to get back to my mom and help her with whatever she needs help with.  I am a fixer, it makes me feel better to fix things.  I feel useful and then it keeps my busy mind, occupied.  I called my dear friend Lynda to tell her the grim news and she was in the process of getting into her car and going to work and her battery wouldn't start.  So I had to give her a ride to work.  I knew she would be praying for me and my mom.

Judy Barnett 

  I arrived to my moms senior housing place, where we have teased her, that she is the Madame Social Butterfly and we are just her caterpillar daughter and granddaughters.  There was lots of buzz and everyone asked me how my mom was.  I couldn't tell them, it was her news to share, whenever and however she wanted to share it.  So when asked, I just said: "You will have to ask her."

I got on the phone and made an appointment with my mom's doctor.  They were  going to give her another provider to see and it was going to be later in the afternoon on the following day.  My mom called them back and explained that she had gotten some pretty grim news the night before and somehow got the receptionist to book her appointment with her own doctor.

My mom called me back to tell me this and said her friend Arlene would be taking her in the morning, I am welcome to come to the doctor just meet them over there.  I told her I would.  I came home and felt exhausted took a nap and Googled: Cancer, Lung Cancer, lots of information about this, so much it made my head dizzy. I drifted off into a very deep sleep.